CRUSE Bereavement Care

The death of somebody close to us can be devastating.  We all have different and completely personal reactions to what has happened. However, it is normal for people to have some or all of the following feelings:-

• Shock: even when the death is anticipated and appropriate.  It is still a shock when it happens. How much more so when the death is totally unexpected and inappropriate.
• Anger: as bereaved relatives, we may feel more could have been done for the person who has died. Quite often, we may also feel angry at ourselves that we failed the dead person in some way – or angry with the dead  person for leaving us.
• Denial: it is very hard to accept the finality of death.  Immediately afterwards, we may go on living as if nothing has happened – enough food is cooked for the deceased, cutlery is put on the table, clothes and furniture are left untouched.  In the short term this helps us manage the shock of a death and allows some breathing space before moving on to accept our world and life course has been permanently changed.

Emotions like these are completely normal – but very strong.  Talking about them with a Cruse volunteer can be very helpful.